5 weeks ago
Showing posts with label Obedience. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Obedience. Show all posts
27 September 2010
Disobeying parents in obedience in Allah
Question :
My parents have told me to stop being friends with good people, and not to travel with them to do ‘Umrah. Please note that I am on my way to becoming religiously committed. Do I have to obey them in this matter?.
Answer :
Praise be to Allah.
You do not have to obey them in disobeying Allaah or in anything that will adversely affect you, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Obedience is only with regard to what is right and proper,” and “There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator.” The person who tells you not to be friends with good people is not to be obeyed, whether they are your parents or anyone else. You should not obey anyone who tells you to be friends with bad people either. But you should speak to your parents in a good manner and in a way that is better, such as saying “These are good people, I benefit a lot from them, I am fond of them and I am learning a lot from them.” You should respond to them with kind words and good manners, and not be harsh with them. If they tell you not to be friends with them, do not tell them that you are seeking out good people and getting in touch with them, or that you have gone places with them if they do not approve of that. You only have to obey them with regard to acts of worship and what is good and proper.
If they tell you to make friends with bad people, or they tell you to smoke or drink alcohol or commit adultery, or other sins, then do not obey them or anyone else who tells you to do such things, because of the two hadeeth quoted above. And Allaah is the Source of strength
Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Maqaalaat li’l-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 6/126
My parents have told me to stop being friends with good people, and not to travel with them to do ‘Umrah. Please note that I am on my way to becoming religiously committed. Do I have to obey them in this matter?.
Answer :
Praise be to Allah.
You do not have to obey them in disobeying Allaah or in anything that will adversely affect you, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Obedience is only with regard to what is right and proper,” and “There is no obedience to any created being if it involves disobedience towards the Creator.” The person who tells you not to be friends with good people is not to be obeyed, whether they are your parents or anyone else. You should not obey anyone who tells you to be friends with bad people either. But you should speak to your parents in a good manner and in a way that is better, such as saying “These are good people, I benefit a lot from them, I am fond of them and I am learning a lot from them.” You should respond to them with kind words and good manners, and not be harsh with them. If they tell you not to be friends with them, do not tell them that you are seeking out good people and getting in touch with them, or that you have gone places with them if they do not approve of that. You only have to obey them with regard to acts of worship and what is good and proper.
If they tell you to make friends with bad people, or they tell you to smoke or drink alcohol or commit adultery, or other sins, then do not obey them or anyone else who tells you to do such things, because of the two hadeeth quoted above. And Allaah is the Source of strength
Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Maqaalaat li’l-Shaykh Ibn Baaz, 6/126
01 June 2010
I cannot obey Him (Allah) in public and disobey Him in private
Narrated `Abdullah ibn Zayd ibn Aslam, from his father, from his grandfather, who said:
When I was accompanying `Umar ibn al-Khattab on his patrol of Madinah at night, he felt tired, so he leant against a wall. It was the middle of the night, and (we heard) a woman say to her daughter, “O my daughter, get up and mix that milk with some water.”
The girl said, “O Mother, did you not hear the decree of Amir al-Mu’minin (chief of the believers) today?”
The mother said, “What was that?”
The girl said, “He ordered someone to announce in a loud voice that milk should not be mixed with water.”
The mother said, “Get up and mix the milk with water; you are in a place where `Umar cannot see you.”
The girl told her mother, “I cannot obey Him (Allah) in public and disobey Him in private.”
`Umar heard this, and told me: “O Aslam, go to that place and see who that girl is, and to whom she was speaking, and whether she has a husband.” So I went to that place, and I saw that she was unmarried, the other woman was her mother, and neither of them had a husband.
I came to `Umar and told him what I had found out. He called his sons together, and said to them: “Do any of you need a wife, so I can arrange the marriage for you? If I had the desire to get married, I would have been the first one to marry this young woman.”
`Abdullah said: “I have a wife.” `Abd al-Rahman said: “I have a wife.” `Asim said: “I do not have a wife, so let me marry her.” So `Umar arranged for her to be married to `Asim. She gave him a daughter, who grew up to be the mother of `Umar ibn `Abd al-`Aziz.
[Related in Sifat al-Safwah and Wafiyat al-A'yan and cited by Ibn al-Jawzi in Ahkam al-Nisa' pp. 441, 442]
When I was accompanying `Umar ibn al-Khattab on his patrol of Madinah at night, he felt tired, so he leant against a wall. It was the middle of the night, and (we heard) a woman say to her daughter, “O my daughter, get up and mix that milk with some water.”
The girl said, “O Mother, did you not hear the decree of Amir al-Mu’minin (chief of the believers) today?”
The mother said, “What was that?”
The girl said, “He ordered someone to announce in a loud voice that milk should not be mixed with water.”
The mother said, “Get up and mix the milk with water; you are in a place where `Umar cannot see you.”
The girl told her mother, “I cannot obey Him (Allah) in public and disobey Him in private.”
`Umar heard this, and told me: “O Aslam, go to that place and see who that girl is, and to whom she was speaking, and whether she has a husband.” So I went to that place, and I saw that she was unmarried, the other woman was her mother, and neither of them had a husband.
I came to `Umar and told him what I had found out. He called his sons together, and said to them: “Do any of you need a wife, so I can arrange the marriage for you? If I had the desire to get married, I would have been the first one to marry this young woman.”
`Abdullah said: “I have a wife.” `Abd al-Rahman said: “I have a wife.” `Asim said: “I do not have a wife, so let me marry her.” So `Umar arranged for her to be married to `Asim. She gave him a daughter, who grew up to be the mother of `Umar ibn `Abd al-`Aziz.
[Related in Sifat al-Safwah and Wafiyat al-A'yan and cited by Ibn al-Jawzi in Ahkam al-Nisa' pp. 441, 442]
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